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During the meth usage cycle, does a person's behavior seem normal?
levy35 |
Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
At what
stage during the meth usage cycle does a person's behavior seem
"normal?" By normal I mean, like their old self...kind, caring, etc.
If they act normal sometimes does this mean they are not heavy
users? |
Replies... |
syndra
love |
Re: Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
To me,
at no point can a meth user act normal unless they arn't using. |
Lacey
LoO16 |
Re: Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
I dont
think any meth user can act normal, unless you mean after they
quit,then im not sure. I heard that researches say that theyre not
sure if a meth user will ever be normal again. |
Spase
monkey |
Re: Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
Well,
in my
experience a user can act 'normal' when still using.
I think it depends upon the user. I know that when I was using I
could act sociably and nice and agreeable and people would think I
was clean. Many people were once 'functional' users. Even when
people use They do care about people... they just are also on edge
in many cases and feel persecuted and so react to everything
defensivly and harshly. At least that was my experience. I know some
people who it changed completely who couldnt hide they were using
but I know I could. Everyones different.
I think the simplest answer though is that no meth problem is a
small meth problem. Even if they dont use alot every day the nature
of the addiction is to become worse over time...
I dont know what else to say except goodluck. |
imlostinky |
Re: Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
My
husband was a "functional" user - he was always caring loving and
nice - unless I interefered with his plans.
As in he planned to go hang out at his user's house , I said I'd
like to go because after all they are just friends- he cops attitude
well I just won't go if I always have to have a shadow.
But as long as I said fine , see you when you get back , he was very
loving.Loving when he left , loving when he got back.
The use happens over time, your concept of normal changes subtly. Or
at least it did for me. Surprising how quickly staying out until 10
or 11 at night with his friends while I sat at home became
normal.How the distance between us - together but alone - became
normal.He had his life , I had none.I lost sight of myself - and
that was normal.
It isn't until now when he has been clean for 6 months that I see
how much our normal changed. Little things I can not find words to
describe.
I have changed - I am stronger now and have a better sense of who I
am.
Not all meth users are violent and so out of control.
But make no mistake, even functional users are a danger - a danger
to themselves and others.No matter how loving they are, they change.
I think the biggest danger is losing yourself , forgetting who you
are and what is important to you. I got so wrapped up in his
addiction, I forgot to live.
Never again. |
XOutlaw
Woman |
Re: Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
I was
very kind and loving when I was wired. It was not until I started to
come down that the meanness came out. I looked like a regular person
and was able to do things like a normal (whatever that is) person
would. It was when I ran out and started to come off that I changed
the most. I would not get out of bed, and was very mean and
unsociable. |
wswife |
Re: Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
My
husband is a "functional" user and is very nice when he is using it
is when he is not using when he runs out that he becomes not so
nice! |
levy35 |
Re: Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
Imlostinky,
thank you so much for your response. That is exactly where I find
myself today. He was never violent; irritated sometimes. It's all
been so puzzling this past year. And as you have said, as long as I
didn't interfer with his "I've been really busy" or ask questions,
everything was fine. And I have spent a lot of time alone and
waiting. He also never wanted to bring me in among his friend
because I didn't "fit." My self esteem has suffered even though I
know it shouldn't. I've even ratoionalized things to such a degree
that I start thinking it's me who has a problem. That I'm the one
causing the problem. I got an inkling that maybe meth was involved
and then I talk myself out of believing this...that drugs is not the
reason for the distance between us...that's it's me. Sounds
silly...why would a mature, professional allow herself to become so
caught up
in all of this emotional downfall. I haven't seen him in over 6
weeks after being together for 12 years. I feel stuck. Anyways...I
know I'll eventually see the sun again and that it just takes time.
Thanks for responding. |
imlostinky |
Re: Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
Don't be so hard on yourself Levy- it
happens to the best of us. What you know in your head sometimes has
a real tough time making it's truth known to your heart.And lord
knows, growing older , getting middle aged spread, wrinkles , and
white hairs - everything that was up is now down- it does not help
that self esteem level at all.
Then there is the "if I were this or that then maybe he wouldn't
use"..........
It is a never ending cycle if you are not careful.
It takes time to realize and accept that
1. We did not cause this addiction
2.We can not cure this addiction
3. We can not control this addiction.
I did all the snoop dog stuff- waiting until he would fall asleep to
ramsack the vehicles, pants pockets , and anywhere else he might
hide his stash. I went through the policing the phone calls- going
everywhere he went when he was not at work.
Maybe it helped in one sense , he could not use comfortably.
But it hurt me more. I lost myself, all that I was proud of most.
I became someone I did not recognize and did not like.
That is when things changed.
I got a job I loved, I started reing what is was about life
that made me happy , I fixed me.
I let go- I grew up. He was welcome to grow up with me if he so
chose but if not, I was moving on.
I knew the kind of life I wanted - I knew who I wanted to be , the
person I wanted to be, the role model to my children and
grandchildren I wanted to be.
He could come with me or stay behind.
His choice.
It was scary to contemplate the loss of a 20 year marriage and life
without him.
But from where I stood , I was already living a life without him -
divorce was just a technicality.
In our case, we both got lucky - he chose us.
But make no mistake, had his choice been meth, I would still be here
going on living the life I want.
There will always be things in life you can not control.But you will
always have the choice of how you let it effect you.
I could not change him but I could change me.
And I did.
I am a good person, I do have a lot left to offer- I am worthy of
giving love and receiving love - real love.Not the love that just
takes and takes and drains every bit of happiness from my soul.
When I felt this , then things changed.
For us who love addicts, it is all we can do. |
TxTigger |
Re: Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
They may
seem "Normal" But you watch them long enough they show it trust me. |
imlostinky |
Re: Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
P.S. He
never wanted to bring me around his friends because I am antisocial
Yep, when surrounded by people so drunk they are falling down and
people so wired their mouths are yacking a 1000 miles a second, I'm
not real pleasant.They make my head hurt. I would have more fun
tweezing my nose hairs |
levy35 |
Re: Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
hehe!
...guess I could get out the old tweezers and pluck away at those
"old age" chin hairs I seem to be sprouting lately. gross! Thanks a
lot all you guys. Even when I've healed and have moved forward I
will never forget this site. I've joined the crusade against the
pitfalls of drug abuse. Personal growth in the devastation drugs can
have on families may one day prepare me to look outside my own realm
of dispair, and I may be planted somewhere/sometime in the midst of
helping someone else. God works in mysterious ways...much love for
all of you from me. |
levy35 |
Re: Question of behavior in the
stages of the meth cycle
PS: I
have a brother who has used crack and now meth. He has been "messed"
up for about 20 years. He has always lived very far away but his use
has forever affected my parents. Emotionally and financially. I felt
anger. Because of this site the anger has turned to understanding.
Understanding is the beginning; the anger is gone. My prayers for
him and his family (they have sometimes lived with no electricity or
food in the house) are much more thoughtful and with a much bigger
heart. |
See also:
Behavior changed after quitting meth- is this normal?
What Stage of the Meth High is this?
Stages of stimulant recovery
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