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Addicted to Recovery?


What to do about getting addicted to recovery?

How does one ever get anything done when one gets addicted to recovery? I am telling myself that I am on sabbatical from everyday life and that recovery from loving an addict-codependency etc.. is the most important thing for me right now..... but with lots of prayer time, kid time, meetings, reading, writing, thinking, meetings, reading, writing, resting, crying, talking, plus all of the leftover b.s. from my addict's madness, I am not getting anything done! Literally, I am close to a failure at doing most of the everyday things-I am keeping up with paying bills for the most part, cooking fairly adequately but cleaning, fixing, pta, soccer, football, calling my mom-relatives, getting my hair cut and everything else...FAILURE-don't feel like it much-no time for it.

I say addicted to recovery lightly, but with the addictive personality that I obviously have, it can be a serious issue when the necessaries don't seem to get done and there isn't anyone else to do them but me.

I am thinking that the best thing to do is truly think of it as a sabbatical or a rehab, I just wish it were easier to explain to family, friends, kids....

--paceset

     Replies...
Sfj Re: What to do about getting addicted to recovery?
I'm about as addicted as anyone can get.

That is my basic nature, just like addiction, I have a HUGE tendency to overdo EVERYTHING. Many addicts are the same way.

But given a choice between addiction to meth, or addiction to recovery - I'll choose recovery.

Am I balanced nicely? Probably not. I spend way too much time on this website. But again, this website is a better place than where I used to spend my time.

And it is getting better. Five years in recovery is just the beginning of a lifetime of moving in a better direction.

The journey is the reward.
donnaeve Re: What to do about getting addicted to recovery?
not sure if this is totally in topic . . . but this is my take on it. by the way im now a month clean of that shyte. anyway part of getting high to me was the inevitable climb back up to sanity. has anyone else felt like this? iv never been an everyday user. intermittent use that varies with availability and levels of 'no'strength.is this addiction to recovery?[in a sense?]:rolleyes
starryeyed Re: What to do about getting addicted to recovery?
So you don't have time to do all these things you need to do, but you do have time to throw in a snotty reply to someone who is bummed out about their sister's drug addiction? Interesting priorities.
paceset Re: What to do about getting addicted to recovery?
Wow starryeyed, you were having a shitty day! I'm sorry I fell asleep after I posted because I had no thought at all about my post being a snotty reply-HELLO!!!! I totally wanted to know what others more experienced and HEALTHY than me had to tell you(and me) because I am on YOUR SIDE!! I am here to help myself and others by the grace of GOD and thank God there are others(like you) who are thinking and experiencing the same things as I am .

Gosh, I guess once again, my words didn't come across clearly. I'm sorry I fell asleep. Starry, I am one hurting soul and I got here partly because I NEVER make snotty comments to hurt anyone and I try wayyy too hard to please and be honest and innocently helpful. I imagine that I am just as ready to be offended as you were-see, I am offended and hurt that you took my care as "snotty" Now, I'm in a shitty place because I live in a world where an addict often knocks me down emotionally for caring and unintentionally rips my heart to shreds because he can't understand anyone honestly caring for him cause he doesn't.

I really did want to know if you could drop her off. I wish I my addict pal would let me drop him off-I ask him everytime I get him in the passenger seat. I love driving by places where I have gone to meetings and just mentioning that we could stop...I know now that I have to give that disappointment to God, but I haven't been able to stop caring yet.
Tender
heartsKS
Re: What to do about getting addicted to recovery?
Balance takes time. It did for me. Years, as a matter of fact
DSS Re: What to do about getting addicted to recovery?
This is something that I am going throu with my recovering meth addict, clean for 5 mon. YEA! I am so proud of him, he was also a cook. We've been married for 24 years and I was all but left out of his life for approx. 5 years while he was gone for days at a time. Now clean since April, I thought I would have companionship back with my husband. Maybe for a short period of time, but then it seems he is a recovery addict. He spends about 5 nights a week and sometimes 2 a day at NA meetings. They also have other outings like bowling ect... I am never invited due to it being anonymous. I feel so left out of his life again. All I want is some companionship and time with my husband. This is so hard. I'm not a selfish person, you know a selfish does not stay with a meth addict. I just pray and trust God for a better future. sfj, please respond, did you and your wife go throu this? I always respect your opinion.
Penel0pe Re: What to do about getting addicted to recovery?
DSS - NA literature actually addresses the issue of BALANCE in recovery - that we CAN and do often get so involved in recovery that we fail to achieve the goal - BALANCE - to live life on life's terms, to have a good, balanced life that is based on the principles of recovery...

Our literature does address this - too much service, too much time spent involved with recovery can be a bad thing when it interferes with our families, our jobs, and the other areas of life that we should be living.

As far as you not being invited because it's "Anonymous?"

I never heard of such a thing. There are open meetings where non addicts, families, and interested memebers of the community are welcomed to attend. Campouts, dances, unity days - we all bring our children, our families - my parents have even attended a meeting just to see what NA is about!

You need to say something. If it is having a negative effect on the rest of your life, it isn't "Recovery" in the truest sense of the word!!

I personally am in service (Web servant for our area, on the Public Relations Comittee, campout committee, secretary for a meeting for a year, coming to this and other websites for an hour or two a day, etc) and I go to 1 to 5 meetings a week - depending on the week!

But, I have to work, I have to take care of my family, pay the bills, and do the real life stuff too.

BALANCE in recovery means we live life to the fullest - INCLUDING recovery. Recovery comes first so we can maintain the rest of our lives... but that doesn't mean recovery is the ONLY thing in our lives if we're doing it right!
paceset Re: What to do about getting addicted to recovery?
I was just reading the lovely word BALANCE and trying to stop my heart from pounding when I read YEARS and then I read your post DSS. No, of course selfish's don't stay with meth addicts but one must become a bit of a selfish to survive a meth addict through recovery -my gosh, I don't think you have given yourself enough awards! Wow! You made it this far...wow! I hope Sfj responds regarding he and wife's own ways of dealing with recovery and loneliness in a marriage and all that can come. I'm not married to my addict and am practicing detachment and letting go at this time. Now, I, myself, was talking about recovering from the disease that loving a meth addict left me with when I was talking of being addicted to recovery but your dilemna is very important to so many. Do you have Al-Anon or Nar-Anon in your life for you? I imagine that just when you are ready to love your husband with all your heart and he has to work his program just to survive, you feel very lonely and left out. I pray for my addict to choose recovery quickly but while that's not happening, I go to my own meetings with my own loving supportive people that are part of my own club (gosh I feel like a 12 year old) and it keeps me busy working on me. I haveto be selfish or I may lose what little is left of me. There isn't much more you can possibly do than to love your man and yourself (you have been through a great battle) and keep on going-and by gosh, get your own club! Seriously though, I go to some NA meetings even though I'm not addicted to drugs (well, nicotine) in the same way most of the members are-instead, I'm affected by drug addiction heavily, but many meetings are open and you & I are perfectly welcome there. Also, Nar-Anon meetings do invite addicts in recovery periodically. Perhaps you and your husband could share a little in the "meetings" part of this wonderful miracle called recovery.

Now, please tell me, how do you get anything done around the house with all of the work that has to be done just recovering?? That's my big question.
Indiana
shedevil
Re: What to do about getting addicted to recovery?
Quote:
There are open meetings where non addicts, families, and interested memebers of the community are welcomed to attend.
Thanks for the info Pen. I was made to feel like an outcast and asked by a few people not to come to the NA meetings anymore. They said that "it isn't good for Tommy." I was just trying to be supportive... That's all...

I guess that just because one group of people is like that, not every group is like that. I felt like such an outcast. All these women giving me dirty looks because I am normal. Does this sort of thing usually happen?

I get a few warm welcomes, but mostly cold fake ones. They had this attitude that they were so much better than I. Whatever happened to principles before personalities?
Sfj Re: What to do about getting addicted to recovery?
That is somewhat common, even though in a perfect world, everyone in the rooms would be Angels and Saints.

The fact is, many are seriously ill people, mentally ill.
There are newcomers who are not very far along in the process of recovery. There are relapsers. There are some normal people, but also hookers, thugs, strippers, criminals, creeps, cops, perverts, murderers, phonies, junkies, PhD's, bikers, lawyers, nurses, rednecks, teachers, accountants, breeders, gays, fathers, felons, parolees, jerks, and other folks, just like you and me
paceset Re: What to do about getting addicted to recovery?
SFj, are you grumpy today because the SEAHAWKS are so awesome? I can't help but always think of you and the 49'ers and my love, Joe Montana.....and how they always beat the seahawks...now the Seahawks are beating the Giants 28-0. Wow, sometimes we are stars and sometimes we are total losers-just like people in general.

Now, I'm still hopin that God and your wife will give you some good meaty wisdom words for DSS and me too. I know that with the years of meth madness that DSS has gone through, she could stand up to any meany or ghoul at an NA meeting. I haven't met any yet, but now, if and when I do, I am tougher and like when the nice ole guy at the Al-Anon meeting asked what he should do with the people who came to meetings who didn't exactly fit into the Al-Anon mold and perhaps had an addict they were dealing with instead of an alcoholic, I piped up and clarified that more than likely, if a person loved an addict, that person probably also loved an alcoholic or many alcoholics more likely!
Indian, dont' you ever let them bring you down and make you feel unworthy of bein part of their sickee club-you just stand up and give-em a piece of your mind!!they need it
Indiana
shedevil
Re: What to do about getting addicted to recovery?
Paceset...

You are so funny! I love it!

Nah... It would be a waste of breath to stand up and tell them a thing or two. Again, my choice was to not go anymore. I realize that I like my Al Anon meetings better. I like being here better.

I realize that I don't have to feel guilty because I am "normal". I also now realize that this is probably the closest thing that those people (in that certain area) have to being "normal".

A chicken in a group of ducks is not normal. A duck in a group of chickens is not normal.

See also:

Abstinence does not equal recovery

What are the meth recovery stages?


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